Poetry, porn, implants: the Tuesday randomizer

Apparently, our Poetry Corner last Friday was a huge hit, because we got a terrific poem in our gmail (likely from one of our vast army of readers) that somehow went to my Spam box-- can you believe that Google thought the gem I'm about to share with you people was somehow the work of an ignorant spammer?

Anyways, it sparked a healthy discussion that I think all can enjoy. The poem is entitled:

Beat her womb with your new big rod, so that she knew who wears the pants!

Now that you've got a gal that's hot
You wanna hump her juicy twat.
She looks so sizzling, she's so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?
Not sure she will wish for more?
You need a dong she would adore!
But how to get it long and thick?
Your only hope is MegaDik!
You'll get so wanted super-size
And see wild craving in her eyes!
Your rod will slam her box so deep,
Tonight you'll hardly fall asleep!

So try today this wonder-pi'll
And change your life at your own will!



Commentary:

G: hahahahaha Does the average guy call it a twat? Who are they making this product pertain to?

B: Yeah I really want to meet some of the people who click on these ads and actually send money for this stuff. I wanna know if they actually receive the product and if they're satisfied with it.

"Oh yeah, I love Mega Dik. I pound my wife's twat every night after taking that"

I mean, the ability to beat a chick's womb is really enticing.

G: Usually when I beat on a womans womb, its with my fist.

B: yeah usually when something is "stirring" in there

G: Sexiest porn quote ever: "But I poop from there"

B: I remember watching one where a white chick was fucking a black guy, and she's like "my granddaddy owned your granddaddy". How did that guy not punch her right in the face?

G:

They really need to stop all acting and story lines in porn. Its all bad acting and bad writing. Just stick to the interview and then the fucking. I don't want a movie out of it. Cause it's never a hot story line. It's always the same corny scenario. The cop who is wearing a sleeveless police uniform comes in to help a lady. He already has an erection before he walks in the door. And the helpless young lady who's 21 and has fake tits and a clit ring just happens to be masturbating on her kitchen table. Then theres usually one cheesy line like "Need a hand" and then she just starts blowing him.

I HATE fake tits.

B: Yeah I agree, anyone who tries to make porn "art" just sucks. All the acting is embarrassing, and nobody gives a shit about a storyline. Do you think anyone keeps watching after they've finished jerking off to see how the story ends?

"Oh, so the teacher gave her an A after she blew him, I didn't see that one coming"

And as for fake tits, very rarely there will be fake tits that are well done, but usually they just look like googly-eyes with the nipples going in separate directions. I'd rather just see small tits that jiggle normally than these balls of chemicals stuffed inside them.

Have you seen Jenna Jameson lately? She looks like Michael Jackson

G: yeah, thats not a good look.

The only time fake tits look good is when the girl has a shirt on and is showing cleavage.








B: she looks like the crypt keeper

G:

Eww. What the fuck?

Dude she used to have a hot face, it wasnt just her body. Goddamn it.

What has this country come to? People now walk around with fake body parts. And not because they were missing limbs or had an accident. Some shallow whore wants lip implants. Maybe her husband will come back now. Its fucking pathetic.

B: Yeah and lip implants never look good either. They always look like they were just stung by bees.

And her body is fucked up too. She looks rail thin and all her bones are jutting out of her skin. Ever since she started dating Tito, she fucked herself up.